Tuesday, November 10, 2009


This just in, a panel of drunken homeless people left over from the ticker tape parade have voted to give Derek Jeter, one of baseball's most horrendous shortstops, a gold glove for his "work" this year.

Yes, you read that correctly. Even ESPN has published an article questioning the mental stability of the voting panel. And you know if ESPN says something disparaging about the Yankees, it must be bad. After all, they had to crawl out of Jeter's ass to write it in the first place.

Derek Jeter UZR for 2009 - 6.6
Erik Aybar UZR for 2009 - 7.8
Elvis Andrus UZR for 2009 - 10.7

EDIT: I forgot about Cesar Izturis UZR 10.8 and Adam Everett UZR 8.9

The voters remarked on how Jeter committed the fewest errors of his career. That's because he couldn't bend over to pick anything up, let alone bobble it. A statue would commit ZERO errors. Let's give it a gold glove.

They probably would if it was wearing pinstripes.



stusigpi said...

I s anyone really surprised?

Sooz said...

The gold glove award has been a joke for quite some time. There are instances worse than this.

Like the time Palmiero won it for first base after playing, oh, 24 games.

In fact, I'm not sure post-season awards mean as much as they used to.

Captain Canuck said...

agreed.... to both of you

Carl Crawford Cards said...

Man...that's just...man. And those are the people who get PAID to do this for a living?! Words fail.

Brian said...

That is really shocking, even though it shouldn't be.

Motherscratcher said...

Jeter only got it because the Indians shifted Jhonny Peralta to third.

NicoLax24 said...

I'm a Yankees fan and there were definitely better candidates for the gold glove, but Jeter does deserve credit for his marked improvement this year lol.

Teixeira definitely deserved that gold glove! He was a vacuum at first base, truly a great fielder!

I'm wondering how Timmy Lincecum only finished 3rd for the Cy Young yet finished so highly in the MVP voting. And for that matter how did Torii Hunter win another gold glove? There have been better outfielders than him for years now.

NicoLax24 said...

wow that totally sounded like I thought Tex should have won it instead of Jeter. What I really meant was that Tex's First base gold glove was well deserved, and Jeter's goldie at ss was a little bit off the mark.

Joe S. said...

O'well. These awards stopped being relevant a long time ago and have generally gone to guys who ALSO contribute offensively.

Although, I don't think Jeter is NEARLY as bad as people make him out to be.

Tim said...

Actually Jeter has received this award so many times because he dated all of the board panel members' daughters.